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How to take action and go change your life ? – Christine Lewicki

David Laroche : How we can take action? I bet the people are wondering, “How I can do that or do that? How to reach my goal?” We were talking about the fact we have to take action. Do you have some tips, some strategies, some advices to take action in this life?

Christine Lewicki : Well, the first thing you need to realize is that everything is created twice. So usually in life, you see your life and there are things that you don't like and so you want to change some stuff in your life. So you want to create something new in your life. Everything is created twice. First, you have an idea. You're like, “Oh, I could do this. I should do that.” Or, “This is great. This is what I want to do.” So you have an idea, but then if you just have the idea you're not changing your life. Okay? It's just an idea.

David Laroche : Yeah.

Christine Lewicki : You're just a thinker. Or the other element is action. You need to go into action to change your life. But if you go into action without an idea, you're just dealing with everyday life, emails and running errands. Yeah. You just run in circles and you don't create anything new. You're in action, but you're not changing your life. So the idea is to combine your great ideas, your inspiration, whatever you want to do, whatever your vision, with action. When you combine this, then you create change. Then, you move forward in your life, so just being very aware of… Many times what's happening is that people tend to either do too much of one or too much of the other. Either they're very good at thinking and they know… I mean, so many people love telling other people or their friends at dinner what they want to do. “One day, I'm going to write a book.” “One day, I want to move to the U. S. One day, I want to do this. This is what I want to do.” So they talk about it and they're very good at talking about it, but they're not taking any action. So some people tend to be there, and some other people are the other way. They're action, action, action, always. Like they wake up in the morning and boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. But they're not really thinking about, “Am I really adding up some actions that are going to create the life that I want?” They're just doing, doing, doing, doing, without really thinking about, “Am I going in the direction that I really want, that really makes sense for me?” So the idea is to first be aware of that. “Am I more of a thinker, like more in my head, or more into action, but I don't really think about what I want?” So you need to combine both, and then when you want to combine both, it's very clear that whatever you do is going to be imperfect. Whatever action you're going to take, it's going to be an imperfect action, because a perfect action doesn't exist. Do you agree with that?

David Laroche : Yeah.

Christine Lewicki : A perfect action doesn't exist. So if you wait for everything to be perfect, if you think, “Okay, I'm going to do this, but first I need to get a better diploma. I need to go back to school. I need to have a perfect website.” If everything has to be perfect, it's never going to happen. It's just, it's not going to happen. The only way to reach perfection is through imperfect action. Yes, because only when you are on the field, on the playground, acting, that's where you learn. That's where you improve. That's where you develop your expertise. That's where you grow, and that's where you become who you want to be. But never in your head, behind your computer, or waiting for another diploma or whatever you're waiting for to go into action.

David Laroche : Great. I would love to know something. You were talking about going to the U. S. for example, and you did that. Why do you live in the United States? I imagine that you had struggled to do that. How did you overcome it?

Christine Lewicki : Well, many people tell me… I wrote a book called, “I Stopped Complaining and Bitching”.

David Laroche : …

Christine Lewicki : No. I wrote this after, when I was in the U. S. I have people telling me, “Yeah, but it's easy for you to not complain, because you're in California and it's sunny. You have the easy life.” It's true that right now, I have to say, I've created a pretty good life for myself. But it's very clear…

David Laroche : You are lucky.

Christine Lewicki : Well, that's what people tell me, “You're lucky.” Yes, maybe. But I can assure you that it was not easy. It's not like I came and I had… I didn't create my life the easy way. I came here with my husband. We thought we were going to stay only a few years. I was pregnant with my first child. I had no idea where I was going to give birth. So I had the courage to come here, pregnant with my first child, never gave birth before, in a country that I don't know, and figuring out insurance and all of that. So my husband had a job, and then he lost his job and for a long time it was too early for us to move back, because the experience was too short. We just had six months, and then it was the dot-com crash. My husband lost his job, and we wanted to stay a little longer. Just we started to have friends. We just bought a car. We wanted to stay a little bit longer, and for about two years we had no money. We had no money. I mean, literally I would wake up in the morning and tell myself, “You need to go through the entire day without going crazy with your baby who's driving you nuts, ” because I was a new mom and it was difficult. “You have to go through the entire day and not spend more than $5. So whatever you do, it won't cost you more than $5, because that's all you have.” Many times, I told myself, “We're going to have to sell the car to pay the rent.” If you're in L. A.without a car, in that city, it's crazy. It's insane, with a baby.

David Laroche : I used to live there.

Christine Lewicki : Yeah. Okay. So many times, I told myself, “We're going to have to sell the car, because we won't be able to pay rent.” So I'm telling this just so that people you know, that yes, I've a pretty good life for myself. But it's not like I moved to the U. S.and it was sunny, and everything was served on a platter for me to just enjoy my life in California. No, we had to create everything. Many, many times with my husband, we were like, “Okay. We just have to do what we have to do, and continue to do what we have to do, and it's going to work out.” But the only way for it to work out was for us to keep doing what we had to do. If you lose faith, if you lose courage, you stop doing, and then you just give up. If you give up, then you fail. So for us, so many times we were like, “Okay. We just…” Same thing with immigration. It was not easy with immigration to jump through the hoop, and jump through the hoop, to go through all of that. So jump through the hoop of immigration and jump through the hoops of business, and you know it's making money so that we can pay the rent and raise a family.

David Laroche : Do you have some tips to keep the faith? Because I think it's maybe the main thing that helped you to keep moving forward. How to keep the faith when you had struggled, when you had some difficulties, continued taking actions? Would you have a process in mind? Do you wonder something? Do you have a process to keep faith?

Christine Lewicki : Yeah. I don't know if it's a process, but I know that for me what was key is to, I call this “feed my source.” My source is my fire. I believe that we all have a flame. It's like you go to the stove and you turn on the gas to cook some eggs, or whatever. You turn on the button and, boom, you have a flame coming out. We all have that. That's what I call “inspiration”. It's the source. It's whatever you call it. Some people call it “God”. It depends on whatever you want to call it. But we have that flame, that force of life that we have within. I feel that my biggest responsibility is to keep that flame alive and to feed that source. If you have a fire, if yourself, you don't take care of the fire, you won't have any flame afterward. You need to take care of the fire with whatever you do, but you also need to protect the fire so that other people are not going to put a lid on the fire and turn it off. So for me, it was very key to recreate an environment where I don't let in… Our brain is pretty amazing. We can capture so many things. But on the other hand, we don't capture everything. We do select what comes in our awareness with a filter, and we can decide what type of filter we want to put into our awareness. I mean, the awareness, the fire, all of this is connected. So for me, it was very key to protect my consciousness, to protect my heart, to protect my flame, whatever you call it, and to make sure that I develop a filter where I capture what I do want to capture. So what I mean, very practically, I turned off TV. I turned off TV. Bad news on TV makes you lose faith on other people, on life, on everything. All the bad news, all the drama that you have on TV with all the TV shows, I mean, all of this is just making you lose faith.

David Laroche : Because you feed your brain with bad news.

Christine Lewicki : People are bad, life is dangerous. If you let that information channel through you all the time, on the radio, on the TV, you start to believe that people are bad, life is dangerous. So if everybody is bad, you're probably going to think that you're bad too, and then you cannot create the life that you want. So choose whatever enters into your awareness. Turn off the radio. Turn off the TV. Or turn on the radio for programs that are supporting what you want to create for yourself. Choose whatever you watch on TV. Choose the documentary. I started to watch way more TEDx Talks. You know TED Talks? Documentaries, reading books that are feeding me, going to church, but having information and make sure that my brain is capturing what I really want my brain to capture, to feed me. Whatever you want to accomplish in life, first you need to take care of yourself. Because otherwise, I mean, you can go run a marathon, but if you're not healthy you'll never cross the finish line. So you need to take care of yourself. Feed the source, feed your soul, feed your body. So one element is what information comes into me? What is the information that I filter, and am I really filtering the information that I want in my life? So making sure that I feed myself with information and knowledge, that really nourishes me. The other thing is surround myself with the right people. There are people in your life that you cannot really choose, your parents, your brothers, maybe your co-workers. Those are people that are around you. But you can choose what role they have in your life and how much you listen to them. You can choose to surround yourself with friends or colleagues, or people in your network that are really feeding you and believing in you. That's where a coach comes very handy too, to also hire a coach that are going to help you believe in yourself, and a coach who's always going to see the greater version of yourself that you don't even see for yourself. So that's great to surround yourself with the right people. Then, the other element is to really take care of your body. Many, many times, we think in life that all the answers about creating success is in our head. “Well, I need to make the right decision. I need to make the right move. It's all about being smart and knowing things.” So you always worry, “Maybe there is something that I don't know. Maybe there is something that I need to learn. Maybe other people know stuff that I don't know to succeed, ” and you're always trying to get information outside. I believe that there is a lot of information inside. So for me, what it means is that I started to dance, meditate, go and walk in natures alone, without a cellphone.

David Laroche : Because that is success, right?

Christine Lewicki : It's part of my success, yes. But I didn't do it consciously. I don't know what I mean. I didn't do it like, “Oh, I have to go on a walk so that I'll be successful.” But I just realized that a big element of my success is that I started to go into nature and hug some trees, and just lay down on the grass in silence and connect. Walk, go on a hike, go to the top of the hill and look at the view. I mean, that's where you connect with life. You connect with the force that is within you. So there's meditation. Dancing has been amazing for me. I mean, I believe in dance. You cannot imagine how much I believe in dance. I think if we could get all the people on this planet to dance more, we would solve a lot of things. When you dance, you're alive. You have fun. You connect the left and the right brain. You do a lot of crossing movement when you dance. It connects the two brains.

David Laroche : I know someone in this room is very happy, I think.

Christine Lewicki : Yes. I deeply believe in dance for men and women. I mean, let's get those people dancing, and meditation, that's also a big one. In France, I feel that many people gave up on religion, because maybe they didn't find what they want in their religion. But by giving up in their religion, they gave up their spirituality, the connection to that force of life. That's where meditation is a great tool to get back to. Connecting with the force of life, connecting with spirituality, and I think it's very key. It's part of keeping that flame alive.

David Laroche : Yeah. Steve Jobs said you have to be connected with something, religion, spirituality. It's amazing.

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